Marian
 
Marian was born in Wellington, Somerset, on 22nd March 1945. Our mother had returned from London to the family home at the Town Mills to care for her own mother, whose health was failing, as well as to be there for the birth and to be away from the danger of the 'flying bombs' still being aimed at London. Though victory was near, the country was still at war. The last V2 fell on 27th March, five days after Marian's birth.
 
Our parents had met by chance. At the outbreak of war, Mary Bruce Bennallack, a girl living in Bristol, answered a Red Cross appeal for volunteers to move to London to help the emergency services with casualties from the expected bombing, and to take on jobs vacated by men called up to serve in the Forces. Bruce (as she called herself), then a secretary in the Wills Tobacco Company, was given a job with the tobacco firm of Lambert and Butler, in the same department as John Thurlow. They were in London throughout the Blitz, mother helping the Red Cross in the evenings and father belonging to the Home Guard. During the Blitz in 1941, the Thurlow's house in East Ham was bombed and they were rehoused further out at Woodford.
 
John and Bruce married in Wellington in December 1943. Father had been called up by then and wore his army uniform at the wedding. In 1944 he was sent to train on Anglesey before being posted to serve in the invasion of Italy. Before embarking he was given a short leave to spend time with his new wife. Many years later Marian was highly amused when mother confided to her that she had been conceived on a hay stack somewhere in the fields of Anglesey! Granny Bennallack died just after Marian was born, so sadly neither of us ever knew her. She was clearly an interesting person with a very interesting history. When war finished, mother and baby Marian moved back to London, to a flat above a shop on the Broadway at Woodford, near to our father's family and offering easy travel to London for his job. Father was demobbed in 1946, and on the back of that I was born in 1947 as one of the 'bulge' year babies. The flat was to be our home for the next ten years.
 
It was a lovely place to grow up in. We got to know all the shopkeepers and had the benefit of being able to play at the back of the shops with the other children living there. There was an area of woods we could play in, as well as a cleared bombsite, about the size of a tennis court, where we could play ball games. Early memories were of the General Election in 1951 when we all lined the streets as Winston Churchill, our local MP, was driven past in an open top car on his way to vote. In 1953 the Coronation of Queen Elizabeth was the first time we watched television. A family in a house near the Broadway invited us to watch with them on their newly acquired set (black and white, of course).
 
That our parents were totally devoted to each other was never in doubt. Together, they imbued in us a sense of humour as well as a sense of values. It was a simple lifestyle: neither drove, so there was no car, and all journeys were either by public transport or on foot. Right up to the time that Marian and I left school there was no television and not even a fridge. We never wanted for any of the essentials of life, but always knew that money was tight, and our parents spent very little on themselves. Sometimes there were treats, such as being taken to see a show in the brand new Royal Festival Hall. Plus plenty of walks in Epping Forest and the Essex countryside, and sometimes further afield. Each year we had a summer holiday by the sea, and a trip to Wellington to see Grandad Bennallack.  Marian joined the Brownies at our local church, later moving on to the Guides, where her natural ability as a leader began to emerge.
 
We spent happy years at our local Primary School, before Marian passed her 11+ exam and went to Woodford County High School for Girls. By then we had moved from our flat to the house in Arundel Drive, that Georgina, Caitlyn and Gwilym remember well. This meant that 'Big Sis', as I called her, no longer had to share a room with her kid brother. At school Marian excelled in sport (swimming and netball particularly) as well as getting good results academically. The athletics side greatly pleased our father, who loved sport and between the wars had represented the YMCA in international athletics and football tournaments. I have to say, however, that my sister was not so strong on music. At school they had lessons in music appreciation, and the music teacher confided to our parents her amusement at an answer given by Marian in one of her tests. Having been played records of concertos being performed by the likes of Yehudi Menuhin and David Oistrakh , the teacher posed the question 'Name one of the world's leading violinists': to which Marian answered 'Max Jaffa' (the equivalent in today's terms of putting André Rieu down as a serious classical musician!).  During her later years at school Marian blossomed socially, and a few boyfriends appeared on the scene.
 
After gaining her A levels she was offered a place at Swansea University to read Geography, though to the amazement of all, once there switched to read politics. She shared a house in Oystermouth with some other girl students and immediately fell in love with the Gower. It was not long, too, before she met and fell in love with Graham. It was clear from the start how proud she was of Graham who, after not the easiest start in life, and having left school at a young age, had pursued his studies in evening classes, gaining the qualifications to get him to university. He had obtained a good degree and was by then a research student working in a specialised field of Metallurgy. After three years Marian graduated, too, and she and Graham were married in Woodford on 30th July 1966 - a memorable date as it also turned out to be the afternoon when England played (and beat) West Germany in the Wembley final of that year's World Cup: a fact which divided the loyalties of the men between the room at the hotel where the Reception was being held and the television lounge. This was of course in the days before video recordings or playback facilities. If you missed the real thing, you had missed it!
 
When Graham left University he secured his job with Tube Investments, in their research laboratory at Hinxton, and thus began many happy years of association with the Cambridge area. Not only was it rewarding in terms of his work, it also became the home where he and Marian raised their family:  Georgina, then Caitlin and Gwillym. Marian and Graham decided she would stay at home to bring up the family, as our mother had done for us, so it was only later that she went out to work and began teaching. But she remained active outside of the family, finding time to manage the Ladies Athletics Team at Cambridge and Coleridge, in which Georgie and Cait also became involved.  For the Thurlow grandparents, watching the family grow, there was the benefit of the newly completed M11 Motorway which made it much easier for Marian to keep in touch with them in Woodford, something they greatly appreciated.
 
Georgie, Cait and Gwil's memory of those years is that they were full of fun and laughter.  Georgie remembers one particular day when Gwil was using bits and bobs from around the house in order to build a raft. Marian, as she watched, probably knew what the outcome would be, but let Gwil continue (perhaps just to keep him quiet!). When the task was finished he proudly dragged it to the local river … where it promptly sank! However, when his tears had been mopped up, the reasons for the failure were explained and solutions discussed. He obviously learned from this lesson because years later, at Marian's 70th birthday celebration at Plas Y Brenin, it was the raft built by Gwil's team that won the prize. This was one of many family events we remember when we were all together. Occasions which were so important to Marian, and of course to Graham, and which we all still value. Cait observes that Marian, being a post-war baby, lived by the motto of 'waste not, want not' being creative in home-made cooking, clothes and even furniture. Cait recalls the large roll of orange waterproof material that Marian purchased and used to make cagoules and leggings for all the family: also, that when she fashioned the Swimming Club kit, sewing yellow ribbon down the side of the costumes, it had the unfortunate effect of allowing water to collect between the ribbon and the costume fabric, causing a drag that was not ideal for the fiercely competitive Funnell children. Being the younger sister, and in the interests of economy, Cait in her early years had to wear a lot of hand-me-downs from her lankier sister, and still has photos of herself, even into her teens, looking embarrassed at wearing these.     
 
Like her own mother, Marian loved the kitchen and cooking. When friends came round to join in the fun the proceedings always finished off with refreshments. The kitchen was the hub of the house, from which Marian managed to turn out vast quantities of delicious food and cakes. However, she got into trouble on one occasion, when the wine she added to a casserole turned out to be one of Graham's prize-winning wines for special occasions: after which Graham put silver foil on the bottles in the wine rack that could be used for cooking! In terms of creativity, Gwil observes that Marian liked to make every event something to remember. When he was obsessed with Mountain Rescue, his birthday cake was shaped like a mountain, with climbers scaling the side of it. On another occasion she created a 'treasure chest' cake from which, when cut into, sweets poured out. Mealtimes were also a time for family discussion. Graham had strong views on many aspects of life, but Marian could hold her own in any conversation and had no time for 'bunkum', as one colleague observed.  She would often say things with a twinkle in her eye, but would never waiver from her point of view. Her career as a teacher only began once the family had been raised. That she had a great passion for making learning exciting and fun, for children of all abilities, was endorsed by her rapid rise from Cherry Hinton to becoming Head at Brunswick Nursey School. Despite the constraints of local authority requirements and challenges from traditionalists, her work in adopting her own version of a new Norwegian approach to learning put Brunswick School on the map, and attracted visits from educational institutions abroad as well as a report in the Times Educational Supplement.
 
This passion and philosophy naturally spilled over into the home environment. Georgie comments that you all benefitted from Marian's wide but secure boundaries, in which you could explore, play, learn and create. Gwil remembers  Marian's reaction on one occasion when, unjustly, he was accused of vandalism at school and put in lunchtime detention. When told of this injustice her response was to say "You might not have committed the vandalism, but you have probably done something to deserve the detention anyway". Most parents would have confronted the school about it but Marian, in one go and with one sentence, taught him several lessons you need for life. Cait recalls an incident on one of the camping holidays in France that were made possible by the extra earnings brought in by Marian's teaching. Cait threw a heavy metal boule which unfortunately landed on a French girl, who was rushed to hospital, bleeding from the head. Cait was mortified, but in her usual cool way Marian, in French, soon had everything under control, and later the French family's children became penfriends and exchange partners.
 
During their years at Sawston Marian and Graham derived enormous pleasure from the gradual arrival of no less than eleven grandchildren, and from watching them all grow up. By then they had invested in their holiday cottage at Capel Curig, so the grandchildren, too, share memories of holidays up there and down here. A garage full of kit like body boards, canoes, and climbing ropes inspired lots of time at play, followed by lessons in cookery and how to make Knickerbocker Glories, meringues, and toffee that broke your teeth. There were walks in the mountains of Snowdonia, and picnics on the Gower beaches. At Christmas there would be puppet shows with home-made puppets, trips to the ballet or pantomime, then, when they were curled up on the sofa, playing card or board games by the fire, or Marian reading books to them. A favourite book, combining her loves of reading and cooking was known to the children as 'Honey Biscuits'. Even when some of them visited just a few months back, they were amazed how trendy and up to date Marian's cooking still was, the latest recipes being served up with apparent ease. This early experience of great food has passed down to the grandchildren, all of whom have a love of cooking. Cait describes Marian as being the 'rock' of the family: she was as important to the grandchildren as they were to her. She would drop anything to drive up and look after them if she and Neil were away for a weekend, and they would arrive back to find thire fridge restocked with meals for the next few days. Marian was very proud of her grandchildren, and rightly so.
 
Marian had a full and active life, and was a true 'networker', long before that term came into use. It is a great testament to her nature that over the years she made so many long-lasting friendships, which have become apparent in the many warm messages the family have received following her death. Her last years were dogged by health concerns that affected her mobility but, even in lockdown, she never complained, and continued to use her creativity to fill her time. Georgie tells of Marian's recent description of a virtual helicopter tour she had been on with her Pennard friends. Georgie had tears in her eyes as Marian described the experience, but it was only five minutes into the story that Georgie realised that the virtual tour had not been on a computer, but all in her creative mind. 
 
My last contact with 'Big Sis' was a long phone conversation on the evening of Christmas Day. Though clearly missing Graham, she was still on good form. Having taken delivery of her new motorised buggy, and had the work done on the drive and entrance to the house to accommodate it, she was full of her plans to get out and about again. And that's how she would like us to remember her.